I am reading this in a place that does not feel like home yet, feeling scared and lost and alone. Thank you for your words. It was timely and what I needed to hear today when I am having a rough day.
Thank you for writing this, I just so happened to stumble upon it in a moment when I really needed these words to flood my mind. Moving abroad away from my family and their children in order to raise my children with my partner has undoubtedly been my biggest challenge too. The self sacrifice has felt all too real, although in hindsight I am reluctantly grateful because these years have had me rise out of the darkest depths and come out a stronger, more resilient mama, which I doubt I would have gone through had I lived somewhere with the support and comfort of my family. Thank you for making me feel seen xxx
Hi Nicola, it’s so lovely to have you here and I’m both happy that you see yourself in my words/thoughts and also saddened as I know all too well the sacrifice and depths of darkness it can bring. But the light, oh gosh, that golden light that shines all the brighter for it is worth it. We can always go back home if we so desire, knowing that we will always be a stronger, more truer version of ourselves as we have really had to dig deep. Thanks so much for being here my love. Sending you so much love - Lis xox
Absolutely. A big thing for me was also learning that it’s okay to feel happiness during the darker stretches, that just because we have been feeling what the depths of darkness bring, it doesn’t mean we should only be feeling that. It’s all very confusing, but the they can coexist. Sending you some love back xxx
Spoken into the depths of my heart. I too moved from England to Australia. It’s been the highest form of self love yet the yearnings for a home I never quite fitted into have only grown with time. Thank you for fitting a little piece of the puzzle back into my heart, feeling less alone in my musings 🩷
Yeh, it’s good to face them rather then push them down. You might need some space and some tissues. Melbourne is gorgeous. I’m actually down there mid November for a design masterclass. I’m in Armdiale, 6 hours north of Sydney. Sending you love & hugs Lori xx
I think so too. Ah I do love her dearly! Enjoy her while you're down here! That sounds wonderful! Armdiale sounds lush, probably much warmer than here xx
Hi Lori, it’s so lovely to meet you! It’s so lovely knowing we are not alone. I had no idea when I pressed publish how much this would resonate with others, but it has really helped me heal that little bit more. It is a constant reminder to ourselves. Sending you lots of love 💕
Your post brought me to tears Lisa. I so feel the truth of your words and I’m scared shitless for choosing the life I dream about almost daily. It’s the opposite of what I was taught to go after. There’s no (financial) security, no status, no way of knowing if it will ever work out. Yet my heart is yearning for a life closer to nature, closer to my heart. I hope I’ll find the courage to go after it, despite the sacrifices that’ll come with it.
Oh Lieke, I really see and feel you my love. I find it’s often better done in smaller incremental steps, rather than one massive leap. Choose the things that bring you closer to yourself each day or each week. Maybe that’s being in nature every weekend. Or honouring the seasons in a special way. If you are currently working and you are finding that it’s not aligning with you. I encourage you to think about ways your skills could be used in another role, one that either gives you more time to spend on your souls nourishment or one that really aligns with it. Sending you so much love. Always here if you need to bounce ideas. Sending you love, L x
Thank you so much for your reply, you’re absolutely right and that’s exactly the path I’m trying right now. Launching my substack and joining the soirée are all small steps. This afternoon I’m off for a long hike in nature. It’s slow progress but I must say these small changes do help!
Everything you wrote feels true to my. That small, still voice is full of love and holds the possibility of our grandest life. The fearful, insistent voice is the ego, simply trying to keep us safe... stay small then no one will notice us. We can’t get in trouble if we stay small, it says followed by flurries of buts and shoulds, what ifs and how can you possibly think...
It takes courage to break free. Congratulations on your uncaring! Isn’t it interesting that we held the keys to the lock all along?
The more I allow the path of the still small voice, the more peace and joy I experience. The more love and self forgiveness I send to myself, the calmer my ego and inner child become.
Thanks so much Patricia. You are speaking my language. I have done a lot of work over the past couple of years. I too, see our ego as that little child that got hurt all those years ago. I have learnt to tell little Lisa that she is now safe. It opens up my heart to all the possibilities so much more when it is done with love. I agree with you, the more we follow that little whisper the more we feel that deeper sense of peace. Sending you love xx
My greatest fear is censorship of natural therapies. I've always feared to put things on social media because of this. Despite decades of study my therapy business still does not support me. But I can't give it up either, it is part of me. My challenge is how to get what I know to be true, out into the world? So I started a Substack just 2 months ago! It is a small beginning but helping me to articulate what I know so others can know too.
I've started off describing homeopathic first aid remedies.
If anyone is interested in that it may be found by clicking on my name.
Thanks for openly sharing your fear Jane. Is there a way that you could offer your alternative therapy alongside your current business? Could you entwine the two somehow? Sending you lots of love to go deeper with this so you can make a start on the path you truly desire, L x
My partner is also Australian and I made the move here from Europe and the words you just wrote could've been mine. To know we're here for a reason, to spread our wings and give our children the opportunity to do the same, to homeschool and allow them the freedom to grow up on their own terms (we also live on a farm lol) and at the same time feeling heartbreak for all the memories and times of connections missed with our families overseas. It actually brings me to tears right now.
Thank you for sharing so vulnerably. I could feel your heart in this xx
I am welling up with your Claudia. It is unbearable some days, but what gets me through is that we made our choices for reasons of the heart, unselfish reasons to give our children a better sense of themselves and the world around them. I know I could not give them the freedom they experience here in the UK. But all those moments missed do break my heart.... do you get home very often? Or have family visit? My mum is here mid-December to spend Christmas with us. It will be the first time we have spent Christmas with her in 9 years and the very first time for my boys - oh my heart xxx
Couldn't have said it better. We try and visit once a year, usually over Christmas (my heart really wants the kids to experience a white Christmas) but since covid flight prices have just been enormous around that period so we usually wait until after the new year now. My dad has been here a few times, my mum is slowly warming to the long travel period and has visited twice over the past 10 years.
It makes me teary thinking about you all together around the Christmas tree!! So so happy for you xxx
This is beautiful Lisa. I am thick in it, the dream following, the opportunity, and oh my stars, the seemingly endless challenges. It is hard, but it is so aligned, and this is the path I will continue to wander xx
Thank you so much Natalie. It’s so special connecting with creatives like yourself. We seem to be walking a similar path don’t we. Thank you for your beautiful kind words 🙏🏻 being in the thick of it is exactly how it feels... x
Lisa, you have a gentle courageous spirit, and it is truly inspiring. Thank you so much for sharing this with us. I sensed there was something inside you burning to be told and I’m glad you did. My family moved too, not halfway around the world like you, but we left California, a place we loved and still do, for better opportunities in Texas. And it has been harder than we imagined. Sometimes we think we’re being silly, missing home so much, but then we’re reminded that our life here is objectively better in almost every way. My wife is able to pursue a career that she would never have been able to in California, and I get to spend almost four hours more a day with her (those hours were previously spent alone in a car commuting to and from work). Life is simpler, people nicer, and we’re doing vastly better financially. I feel now that what I miss most are the memories of home, not home itself. But so much good does come from sacrifice, and it’s important to remember and treasure that balance.😊
T, your words. My goodness. I feel teary reading them. Thank you for saying all of this. You are so right, it truly is the memories of home, not home itself that often haunt me. Maybe knowing this can bring us both a little more peace. It felt so cathartic in a way, getting this down on paper. But it feels raw. There is so much duality here at play here. I hear you on the simpler life, nicer people, more community and more financial freedom too. My memories are vivid and beautiful and grand, but they are also torture. Thank you again, for seeing me, and seeing yourself in my words as well 🙏🏻🥹
Yes especially because I did the whole move to another country, spent 26 years there, and have now moved back home (with spouse). I look at my younger self with such awe at how brave she was. (Although I remember the tears too.)
"Yet the move here has given me access to limits I never knew I had. It has seen me witness my deepest strengths." I love these words. This whole piece. I relate deeply. We never wish to be pushed to those limits but what an incredible thing to witness ourselves endure challenges and re-emerge from then time and time again. We are capable of so much more than we think.
Oh Rahma, we truly are capable of so much. There are those days, when we wish we didn't have to be, just like you said, but there is also so much beauty in pushing ourselves. Thank you darling for reading and seeing me, also for sharing that you relate to this piece. Means the world to me. x
I love this Lisa and thank you for that window into your world. The decisions that we make for our highest good can feel like the hardest of all. Especially when we cannot see into the future. This is where we have to trust and surrender. The more we do this the more we are asked to give up in terms of what we once thought we couldn’t live without. This is when we begin to understand the self. I remember when I went backpacking to Australia, it was the only time I every truly understood what being homesick meant. It was so far away! I’m glad you have built a life where you can be yourself, that’s a beautiful thing. 💫🙏
Oh Louise, thank you so much for these words. I feel truly seen by you. It really is such a long way away, I do often question if it was the 'right' decision, but you can only trust where your heart wants to go in that moment. At some point, in the future, this may change. I do truly love our life here though. Thank you for reading xx
I am reading this in a place that does not feel like home yet, feeling scared and lost and alone. Thank you for your words. It was timely and what I needed to hear today when I am having a rough day.
I’m so glad you found my words and they were able to soothe your soul today. Go gently my love. Thanks for being here xox
So beautiful 💖 I really needed to read this today. Thank you x
Thanks for reading Meg. I’m glad you found some solace in my words my love xx
“The unfurling of my wings..” Indeed. I am celebrating you. 🥹
Thank you my love. I needed to read your comment today. It’s a roller coaster that’s for sure 🤍
Thank you for writing this, I just so happened to stumble upon it in a moment when I really needed these words to flood my mind. Moving abroad away from my family and their children in order to raise my children with my partner has undoubtedly been my biggest challenge too. The self sacrifice has felt all too real, although in hindsight I am reluctantly grateful because these years have had me rise out of the darkest depths and come out a stronger, more resilient mama, which I doubt I would have gone through had I lived somewhere with the support and comfort of my family. Thank you for making me feel seen xxx
Hi Nicola, it’s so lovely to have you here and I’m both happy that you see yourself in my words/thoughts and also saddened as I know all too well the sacrifice and depths of darkness it can bring. But the light, oh gosh, that golden light that shines all the brighter for it is worth it. We can always go back home if we so desire, knowing that we will always be a stronger, more truer version of ourselves as we have really had to dig deep. Thanks so much for being here my love. Sending you so much love - Lis xox
Absolutely. A big thing for me was also learning that it’s okay to feel happiness during the darker stretches, that just because we have been feeling what the depths of darkness bring, it doesn’t mean we should only be feeling that. It’s all very confusing, but the they can coexist. Sending you some love back xxx
Spoken into the depths of my heart. I too moved from England to Australia. It’s been the highest form of self love yet the yearnings for a home I never quite fitted into have only grown with time. Thank you for fitting a little piece of the puzzle back into my heart, feeling less alone in my musings 🩷
Where are you based my love? X
Lovely to meet you too 🩷. You have inspired me to sit with these feelings right at the surface of my throat. I’m in Melbourne 💛
Yeh, it’s good to face them rather then push them down. You might need some space and some tissues. Melbourne is gorgeous. I’m actually down there mid November for a design masterclass. I’m in Armdiale, 6 hours north of Sydney. Sending you love & hugs Lori xx
I think so too. Ah I do love her dearly! Enjoy her while you're down here! That sounds wonderful! Armdiale sounds lush, probably much warmer than here xx
Hi Lori, it’s so lovely to meet you! It’s so lovely knowing we are not alone. I had no idea when I pressed publish how much this would resonate with others, but it has really helped me heal that little bit more. It is a constant reminder to ourselves. Sending you lots of love 💕
Your post brought me to tears Lisa. I so feel the truth of your words and I’m scared shitless for choosing the life I dream about almost daily. It’s the opposite of what I was taught to go after. There’s no (financial) security, no status, no way of knowing if it will ever work out. Yet my heart is yearning for a life closer to nature, closer to my heart. I hope I’ll find the courage to go after it, despite the sacrifices that’ll come with it.
Oh Lieke, I really see and feel you my love. I find it’s often better done in smaller incremental steps, rather than one massive leap. Choose the things that bring you closer to yourself each day or each week. Maybe that’s being in nature every weekend. Or honouring the seasons in a special way. If you are currently working and you are finding that it’s not aligning with you. I encourage you to think about ways your skills could be used in another role, one that either gives you more time to spend on your souls nourishment or one that really aligns with it. Sending you so much love. Always here if you need to bounce ideas. Sending you love, L x
Thank you so much for your reply, you’re absolutely right and that’s exactly the path I’m trying right now. Launching my substack and joining the soirée are all small steps. This afternoon I’m off for a long hike in nature. It’s slow progress but I must say these small changes do help!
Everything you wrote feels true to my. That small, still voice is full of love and holds the possibility of our grandest life. The fearful, insistent voice is the ego, simply trying to keep us safe... stay small then no one will notice us. We can’t get in trouble if we stay small, it says followed by flurries of buts and shoulds, what ifs and how can you possibly think...
It takes courage to break free. Congratulations on your uncaring! Isn’t it interesting that we held the keys to the lock all along?
The more I allow the path of the still small voice, the more peace and joy I experience. The more love and self forgiveness I send to myself, the calmer my ego and inner child become.
Thank you for sharing your journey...
Thanks so much Patricia. You are speaking my language. I have done a lot of work over the past couple of years. I too, see our ego as that little child that got hurt all those years ago. I have learnt to tell little Lisa that she is now safe. It opens up my heart to all the possibilities so much more when it is done with love. I agree with you, the more we follow that little whisper the more we feel that deeper sense of peace. Sending you love xx
My greatest fear is censorship of natural therapies. I've always feared to put things on social media because of this. Despite decades of study my therapy business still does not support me. But I can't give it up either, it is part of me. My challenge is how to get what I know to be true, out into the world? So I started a Substack just 2 months ago! It is a small beginning but helping me to articulate what I know so others can know too.
I've started off describing homeopathic first aid remedies.
If anyone is interested in that it may be found by clicking on my name.
Thanks for openly sharing your fear Jane. Is there a way that you could offer your alternative therapy alongside your current business? Could you entwine the two somehow? Sending you lots of love to go deeper with this so you can make a start on the path you truly desire, L x
Popping back in to say! Woah!! Lisa, this post is #1 in Design -- or at least that’s what popped up in my Notes feed today! 🎉🎉
Haha thanks Leanne. I loved adding the little birds, they felt so relevant. Thanks for noticing xx
Oh Lisa you spoke straight to my heart here.
My partner is also Australian and I made the move here from Europe and the words you just wrote could've been mine. To know we're here for a reason, to spread our wings and give our children the opportunity to do the same, to homeschool and allow them the freedom to grow up on their own terms (we also live on a farm lol) and at the same time feeling heartbreak for all the memories and times of connections missed with our families overseas. It actually brings me to tears right now.
Thank you for sharing so vulnerably. I could feel your heart in this xx
I am welling up with your Claudia. It is unbearable some days, but what gets me through is that we made our choices for reasons of the heart, unselfish reasons to give our children a better sense of themselves and the world around them. I know I could not give them the freedom they experience here in the UK. But all those moments missed do break my heart.... do you get home very often? Or have family visit? My mum is here mid-December to spend Christmas with us. It will be the first time we have spent Christmas with her in 9 years and the very first time for my boys - oh my heart xxx
Couldn't have said it better. We try and visit once a year, usually over Christmas (my heart really wants the kids to experience a white Christmas) but since covid flight prices have just been enormous around that period so we usually wait until after the new year now. My dad has been here a few times, my mum is slowly warming to the long travel period and has visited twice over the past 10 years.
It makes me teary thinking about you all together around the Christmas tree!! So so happy for you xxx
Thanks my lovely 🥰 I cannot wait. It’ll be the most magical two weeks. Will be hard to say goodbye though 😭🥹
The goodbyes are always the hardest .. especially knowing it'll be another long wait until you get to hug them again.. 🫶🏻✨
This is beautiful Lisa. I am thick in it, the dream following, the opportunity, and oh my stars, the seemingly endless challenges. It is hard, but it is so aligned, and this is the path I will continue to wander xx
Thank you so much Natalie. It’s so special connecting with creatives like yourself. We seem to be walking a similar path don’t we. Thank you for your beautiful kind words 🙏🏻 being in the thick of it is exactly how it feels... x
Lisa, you have a gentle courageous spirit, and it is truly inspiring. Thank you so much for sharing this with us. I sensed there was something inside you burning to be told and I’m glad you did. My family moved too, not halfway around the world like you, but we left California, a place we loved and still do, for better opportunities in Texas. And it has been harder than we imagined. Sometimes we think we’re being silly, missing home so much, but then we’re reminded that our life here is objectively better in almost every way. My wife is able to pursue a career that she would never have been able to in California, and I get to spend almost four hours more a day with her (those hours were previously spent alone in a car commuting to and from work). Life is simpler, people nicer, and we’re doing vastly better financially. I feel now that what I miss most are the memories of home, not home itself. But so much good does come from sacrifice, and it’s important to remember and treasure that balance.😊
T, your words. My goodness. I feel teary reading them. Thank you for saying all of this. You are so right, it truly is the memories of home, not home itself that often haunt me. Maybe knowing this can bring us both a little more peace. It felt so cathartic in a way, getting this down on paper. But it feels raw. There is so much duality here at play here. I hear you on the simpler life, nicer people, more community and more financial freedom too. My memories are vivid and beautiful and grand, but they are also torture. Thank you again, for seeing me, and seeing yourself in my words as well 🙏🏻🥹
This resonated so much but I can’t quite articulate it.
It is such a hard thing to articulate, hence why it was in my drafts for over a week 🫣
Yes especially because I did the whole move to another country, spent 26 years there, and have now moved back home (with spouse). I look at my younger self with such awe at how brave she was. (Although I remember the tears too.)
Yes I am sure there was Leanne. 26 years is a long time. So many new friends and memories created, thanks for sharing xx
"Yet the move here has given me access to limits I never knew I had. It has seen me witness my deepest strengths." I love these words. This whole piece. I relate deeply. We never wish to be pushed to those limits but what an incredible thing to witness ourselves endure challenges and re-emerge from then time and time again. We are capable of so much more than we think.
Oh Rahma, we truly are capable of so much. There are those days, when we wish we didn't have to be, just like you said, but there is also so much beauty in pushing ourselves. Thank you darling for reading and seeing me, also for sharing that you relate to this piece. Means the world to me. x
I love this Lisa and thank you for that window into your world. The decisions that we make for our highest good can feel like the hardest of all. Especially when we cannot see into the future. This is where we have to trust and surrender. The more we do this the more we are asked to give up in terms of what we once thought we couldn’t live without. This is when we begin to understand the self. I remember when I went backpacking to Australia, it was the only time I every truly understood what being homesick meant. It was so far away! I’m glad you have built a life where you can be yourself, that’s a beautiful thing. 💫🙏
Oh Louise, thank you so much for these words. I feel truly seen by you. It really is such a long way away, I do often question if it was the 'right' decision, but you can only trust where your heart wants to go in that moment. At some point, in the future, this may change. I do truly love our life here though. Thank you for reading xx